Voulez Vous Manger Le Viande?

[amalthya]

Monday 11:33 am

I don't even know how to say "I don't eat mammals" in French, which is the most likely cause that, for dinner last night, I had the Congolese standard of Fufu and MEAT. Of course, the meat was tough, overcooked, and I could only choke down a bit of it, but hey, Balume had made it for me and i felt obligated to eat it.

Fufu is a lot like posho, or ugali. It's generally maizemeal, ground up, in a loaf-ish type shape. It's a little chewier than Ugali is, but it's not bad. It sucks cold, though.

I shouldn't worry SO much about being unable to swim thus far, if only because the array of available foods that I eat here is very, very limited. At restaurants, I basically stick to pizza or spaghetti, and I've barely seen any LIVE chickens here, so it's not that surprising that there's really no chicken on the menus either. Other than "Poulet grillé" which sounds... somehow... less than appealing.

Anyway, I know now how new mothers feel. As part of my purpose, the chimps were sleeping in the room next to mine last night, with only me nearby them. And I'll tell you -- I barely slept at all.

I woke up constantly during the night, convinced that I'd heard them "cry" or bang things, or move, or anything.

But everytime I opened the door into their bedroom, they were all fast asleep. Figures, right?

I woke up at 3 am, not sure what time they'd wake up. I was afraid to go back to sleep, in case I'd sleep through when they woke up, so I just stayed awake. I'd convinced myself upon waking at 3 am that it was 7 am anyway.

So, with the sound turned way down, I watched Veronica Mars and waited until the babies woke up.

Yes, living in the chimp house is isolating, mostly because I don't really know anyone, I don't speak French, and I no longer have that constant lifeline to communicating with my friends - The Internet™.

So yes, isolating. But I'm starting to perceive each of the chimps as an individual now anyway. I have a specific rapport with each chimp, and they know me at this point and are comfortable with me.

I've never felt more calm and sort of motherly than this morning -- I took my apple and went and sat out on the veranda. The kids were over by the tree, swinging with Balume and playing. Etaito came running over, his arms up, playfully, and climbed up onto my lap.

He watched me eat carefully, touching my face as I ate and peering into my mouth. I bit off pieces of apple and gave them to him, and he continued to sit on my lap, watching me, as we ate together.

I took another bite, and Etaito, eager for more, put his little fingers into my mouth, trying to get the apple piece out. I wasn't aware that half-masticated apple was such a delicacy, but I'd rather just give him that piece and bite off a new one for myself.

The kinship I felt, though -- the closeness, and, without sounding dirty at all ... the intimacy of it. He felt totally safe with me, and I with him. It was just incredible.

That being said, because I can't communicate properly with the humans anyway, I guess it makes sense that I get along so well with the chimps. And being in the office today, I miss them already.

Weird, huh?

Comments

[proserpia.livejournal.com]

It's an amazing feeling to be that connected with an "animal." Once you reach that level with them, life just utterly changes for both you and the amazing creature that you are bonding with. It seems that way for you and the chimps, it was that way with me and the birds. You're becoming the chimp momma. You reach a point where you just know them, know how to treat them, respect them, love them, and when you hit that point, they know it as well, and they return the gesture. For me with the birds, I'm reaching the peak of that point. It will feel even more amazing when you hit the point where even the meanest of chimps utterly adore you. It may take some time and trust building, but I bet you're going to hit that point and you're going to meet the scariest, meanest chimp of them all, and they are just going to shower you with affection. It even happened to me the other day at a bird store in PA with a "mean, aggressive, bastard of a brain damaged bird" that normally attacks everyone in sight... except for me. He actually sustained brain damage during his hatching. The bird wasn't even nice to the owners, yet he let me shower him with snuggles and affection, leaving the store workers, owners, and customers slack jawed. I can't wait until that happens to you, it'll amaze everyone and make you feel even more amazed and honored than the chimp in one of your newer posts has made you feel (the one you want to name sweet).
goodluck ;)

[amalthya.livejournal.com]

I love that you put "animal" in quotation marks because it feels so right - somehow it has a separating, derogatory connotation.



It's still tough being entirely responsible for someone else's well-being though. It's stressful, and exhausting. At least with dogs they leave you alone for a while and do their own thing.